2011-12-31 15:46:10 |
Mom Makes a Porn Video
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Nice Job. Interesting scenario. Do they ALL get together? |
2012-01-07 17:52:13 |
Bouncing on the Mower
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good job. A little proof reading and a little more continuity. Ages are a turn on (personally) but she could seem to act and speak more like her age. Good that you're able to come to a climax without going "all the way" |
2012-03-06 23:31:24 |
Amy's passion
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intriguing setup but take your time with the action in the last paragraph. that should be half of the story |
2019-02-28 00:51:58 |
Growing Up CH1
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What parts do you feel are realistic? What seems too far fetched? |
2020-11-13 13:16:09 |
Quaran-Teen
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There's more! The whole story didn't upload. I've got to tell you what else happened! |