2018-10-26 03:52:09 |
Poor in new world
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The idea isn’t terrible. It could use some more development. The writing is kind of stilted and doesn’t flow well. I always think size details and things of that nature detract more than add to a story. Setting is more important to establish. Physical features need to be described, but they’re more a way to establish the personality of a character than anything else. |
2018-10-26 04:01:35 |
True North
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I love the way you describe enough about the girl, but leave it vague enough that my imagination can fill in the blanks. The only downside is a few typos. Great effort overall. Deserves a much higher rating than it is receiving so far. |
2018-10-27 14:43:53 |
Revenge of a D&D Nerd
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If you vote negative please, please leave constructive feedback. I’m trying to get better! |
2018-10-28 11:36:58 |
Boys School. From Nothing to Every thing.
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Great work! |
2018-11-01 09:57:53 |
A Sexy Day
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It’s not a bad story, but the outrageous size stuff is always a turn off for me. |