| 2012-10-02 22:28:01 | 
			
				
					First time with the girls.				
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			Good first time, but the past tense of cum is came, not cummed. Plus you have a lot of sentences that are runons. Other than that I look forward to other stories by you. | 
		
			
			| 2012-10-06 11:08:16 | 
			
				
					Twin Japanese Nieces  Pt6_(0)				
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			I wonder if Mark had sex with the twins and his sister. It seems to me like Mark and Shiori are interested in each other. | 
		
			
			| 2012-10-08 00:35:55 | 
			
				
					sex with my cousin jessica				
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			You have the basis of a great story, but please use punctuation, correct spelling, as well as proper grammar. | 
		
			
			| 2012-10-08 00:41:59 | 
			
				
					stepmom grace				
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			Learn to spell, learn proper sentence structure, and learn about punctuation. | 
		
			
			| 2012-10-10 10:06:34 | 
			
				
					Family Tragedy				
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			Great job. Continue with this storyline it has great potential. |