| 2011-10-29 16:31:48 |
with my little brother
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OK story, considering English must not be your primary language. So . . . when did your brother get you pregnant????? |
| 2011-12-18 11:31:09 |
My new bride
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The Story is good - but without enough backgroiund. I myself have trouble proofreading my work - but yours definately needs proofreading. The use of "To' for "Two" for instance . . . .and you don't put thew "Hood Down" on a convertable, you put the "Top Down". And then there is the confusion about whom is speaking? You got good ideas . but need to clean it up. And for God's sake, publish so there is space between the paragraphs - it's doable. Keep up the good work. |
| 2011-12-24 18:11:27 |
Special Bond-Long Weekend at the Lake Chapt 28-35
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Well of course I know the difference between the 'Pubic' Bone and the 'Public Bone' . . . . the Public Bopne is what you get when you read my work! Seriously though, this is the problem with Spell Check. . . . if it is a REAL word, it doesn't pick it out. As I said before, proof-reading my own work is a problem. |
| 2012-01-02 00:22:11 |
Special Bond-Long Weekend at the Lake Chapt 1-27 (Revised)
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Boner, not Bonner, huih? Yet another word that wasnt in Spell-Check! I'll add it :) |
| 2017-08-29 17:04:33 |
My girlfriend taught me to jack off in 7th grade
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if this really was your first story, it was pretty damn good! You need more character development and I like to see a back story . . . . like how he accidentally finds out his "strict Catholic Parents" are secretly swingers! Keep up the good work. as you'll only get better. If you read my story, 'Special Bond - Long Weekend at the Lake' let me know what you think. DSGIRLSD |