2013-06-13 20:35:18 |
Secrets of an Officer\'s Daughter
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you need to get the storylines sorted out properly,,first your writing about adults, and next paragraph a bunch of kids in the pool. coild be interesting in later chapters though. |
2013-06-13 20:43:08 |
Secrets of an Officers Daughter part 2
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noty worth reading,too many plot mistakes to even know where this story is going,get your facts write before you publish..not even going to try and make sense out of it, |
2014-12-13 21:38:04 |
Asian Mom Jenny and her son Chris Series 2: Part 3
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Personally for me, I think that you are carrying the fem dom , and pissing too far, spoils the whole concept of mother and son loving each other. |
2015-08-18 00:06:19 |
Robert's Story continues
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that is not love, it is almost rape. spoiling the story already.. |
2014-12-31 15:53:17 |
HOT BOX, CHAPTER 2 THE JUNGLE
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So good to have you back my friend, I and many others have really missed you... |