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Comments from Ed Itor
Date | Story title | Comment |
---|---|---|
2013-12-03 18:57:17 | My Sexy Cousins (Part 1) | So let's get this straight you were 6 and you had an orgasm which doesn't happen in a male until he nears puberty. You write in a constant block running words together, making it hard to read. This story wasn't the only fantasy. |
2014-03-23 18:39:42 | boy in the grass 32 | "and the beat goes on" the new adventures have taken the story on when it seemed as if it was about to run out of steam. Please though no more death and keep Amy as the joy of the family without making her seem too sickening sweet. |
2014-05-10 04:26:39 | Boy in the grass 54 | This is what we've been waiting for the story. Like others I too think that you have to stop adding new members to the group. Have them find the boys family who are loving and concerned over his disappearance you could even have his younger sister was one of the 29 and maybe have them take in Jazz. Please do not have Carol or her lover be "Mrs. Big", a twist would be Marge's deceased hubby. It doesn't have to be some one we know but get the cop that wanted to meet Max involved heroically, as an arresting officer, when it all goes down. Get the whole team back together for the take down and have Max create disguises like IMF to confuse and confound the bad guys. Just keep the episodes coming and follow your own game plan, if you do need some feedback some of the writers here are always willing to help. |
2014-05-13 18:42:12 | Boy in the grass 56 | I too enjoyed this chapter except that now the wait for the next one begins, again. I do wonder why the parents are there and having Carol & Stella take Han adds a new plot. Still wondering who Mr./Ms Big is and cannot wait to see how the next battle goes. |
2014-05-15 19:19:51 | Boy in the grass 57 | This story is progressing very nicely and the bike will be a great stealth vehicle for Max's stalking of their victims. I picture the helmet with the skull's face painted on the dark faceplate in the see through stencils they use now a days. I am looking forward to Rick's reaction to June/May's revelation and the fact that Max is taking up space already being a High school grad. Yes I know he is learning interaction and better communication skills but it will still be interesting as it dawns on the other parents. It should also be fun to see the other parents' involvements, because none are stupid people. I think Max doing Thomas that way let Wu off too easy, hopefully more is planned for him and his brother. Also can't wait to find what the butterflies/dragonflies can do and it will be great when Rick gets his as that will confirm his place in the family. Keep up the good work and now the long wait begins for the next chapter ... again. |