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Comments from Mark Twayn
| Date | Story title | Comment |
|---|---|---|
| 2009-11-06 04:15:15 | A Mother, a Daughter and a Sailor | The coastguard took him away in the morning |
| 2009-11-11 22:16:33 | A Very Difficult Daughter | Hi Penguin Many thanks for your constructive comments and I agree with most of them. My main reason for writing the story was to see how a relationship, as opposed to a quick fuck, might develop between the two with their age difference. The main purpose of Sally was to add to Jeff's dilema about Kylie's age and to provide a way for them to live together. I'm pretty happy with most of it until exactly the same stage as you and agree with you about the wind up. Of course the 'lovely's are an embarrassment. If I wrote it again, which I won't, I think I would leave Sally right out of it and find a different way to keep them together. There's always a problem with length. Too long and readers get put off and I do like my yarns to have an audience. Perhaps a chapter 2 but what would be the story apart from incest, which I didn't think fitted here? Who knows. Thanks again. I'll enjoy having a look at your story. MT |
| 2009-11-12 21:32:10 | Good one | |
| 2009-11-18 00:44:03 | Keeping Fit | Lift your game man!!!!!! You are a good writer, the sex scenes are great. But the build up, the seductions. Fucking hell. In the Landlady story it happened because she saw you jacking off in the bath. This one because your 9 inch dick was too big for your speedos. Are you seriously trying to say that your lifetime of successful womanising always started with you showing your dick? You've got a way with words. Share your secret. Tell us what you whispered in their ears which made all those virgins loose their cherries and all those happily married women forget their wedding vows. |
| 2009-11-22 15:21:17 | Technology can be a curse | It's your best story for me. Great build up, but sex was too short. |