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Comments from InkWriter1
| Date | Story title | Comment |
|---|---|---|
| 2016-11-30 06:55:12 | Owning my Parents | This was pretty well written, and I hope you write sequels. It's more than just physical and that's what I like, but I do hope you get more physical. I have to say that you use a lot of elipses. They should only be used for dialogue, not narrative. |
| 2017-06-03 00:22:01 | Mom Caught Me pt. 3 | The story is good but you should get someone to spell check. I am sure there are programs online that will do it for you for free. |
| 2016-10-25 18:35:59 | Mistress in the Making Phase 3 | Wow, I can't wait to read the next chapter. I am confused as to Aunt Mary's reaction. I'm guessing there must be some traumatic event in her past for her to react like that. Maybe she did the same thing when she was learning? It all feels very real though, and it keeps me in immersed. Also if you want someone to proofread, let me know. I help others, not on this site, with editing their stories, and I'd be happy to help. Keep it up! |
| 2016-12-12 06:05:02 | Resort - Part 1 - Unexpected | This was really well written. You probably gave a little too many details on a few things that didn't need them, like the mother's face at the end, but there were a lot of things that were really well described and said. This was also a good setup, and it had a decent amount of "hot stuff," though it could have used a little more. I'm excited to read more though, so it still got the job done. Good job. |
| 2016-12-14 09:16:49 | Resort - Part 2 - As You Are | That was a big jump. From their first time to months into their new life. I like how you ended it but I would have liked to have seen them adjust to their new life as well. Hope to see more, though I'm guessing it's going to make big jumps rather than go through it slowly. |