| 2013-04-11 08:10:57 |
Denver and Alex
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this was a really good story - it even had me turned on. But you should try to make your paragraphs a shorter, if only to make it easier to read. I'll happily read more of your stories. |
| 2013-04-11 08:46:17 |
For the Love of Big Cocks
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Wow... this was a Really good story. This is the second story of yours I've read. Please keep writing...you have a fan :) |
| 2013-04-11 09:06:13 |
First Dick I Sucked
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good story but the sex events were too short and over too quick... it would have been more entertaining if your character took longer in nnot only giving head but also described herself in the moment for longer than a couple of sentences. It's almost as if she took a long time to get these guys to come but it meant nothing to her. |
| 2013-04-11 09:09:17 |
First Dick I Sucked
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And as if she didn't feel much with her mouth and tongue nor felt any excitement from giving her partners any pleasure... nor any personal sense of gratification. your character plays her role as if she was merely there to be used... and yet, she didn't see it that way. |
| 2013-04-11 09:19:51 |
My Adopted Daughter_(0)
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really good story... a little short but if you're going to do a series I think it will be more satisfying to read all at once than to read only one short story. You may want to consider combining them into ONE story with multiple chapters. I'm looking forward to reading more...Shannon is an intriguing mix of submissive, well-built and youthful sex partner. |