| 2011-03-31 15:19:12 |
Father/Daughter Bonding_(1)
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Good story, pretty good writing, excellent lead into the action. The end was a bit too fast, though. One criticism - make sure to add lines between your paragraphs. Helps the flow of the story. |
| 2011-03-31 15:33:45 |
The Olsen
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You call this a story? |
| 2011-04-06 09:22:42 |
unexpected camping guest
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This rambled way too much, had no real plot outside of the third wheel about to get nailed. The paragraph, sentence, and grammatical structure was horrendous. Do us all a favor, next time you try to write, take lessons or go back to high school and relearn, |
| 2011-04-06 09:35:49 |
After school incest
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Well, it's obvious English is not your strong subject. Grammar, spelling, plot direction - it all just sucked. Not even a good story, either. Oh well. And for those who choose not to log in, sometimes it's because you get logged out. Even still, criticism should be criticism - not derogatory, just criticism. |
| 2011-06-12 09:43:02 |
Fukin my young sister in law
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It doesn't matter if you use a computer or your phone, if you can't use proper grammar and spelling, you shouldn't post. Period. And if you truly got a B+ in English, perhaps your parents should go back and slap the teacher, cause no matter what excuse you use, you should have failed. |