2020-06-03 02:36:08 |
Sophie, Becoming Daddy's Perfect Fucktoy (The Complete Tale)
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Plagiarism. You stole this, so at least own up to it. |
2020-06-23 21:03:43 |
Family holiday to Turkey -Dads holiday
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Work on the writing a bit, but overall it was a really good story. Would have enjoyed it more with Dave being the last to fuck #3, but it's your story. |
2020-06-23 21:04:06 |
Family holiday to Turkey -Dads holiday
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Work on the writing a bit, but overall it was a really good story. Would have enjoyed it more with Dave being the last to fuck #3, but it's your story. |
2020-06-23 22:49:05 |
Babysitter Surprise
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A few problems - is it Tina or Sam? And it is cuming - not cumin, which is a fucking herb. My bet - you stole this from somewhere and changed names to make it appear to be yours. Fuck wads abound, don't they? |
2020-07-29 19:38:37 |
A Story of the Paper Vow
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Not bad for a first story. Hope you take this as intended - constructive criticism: watch your spelling, check grammar, each time someone different speaks, start a new paragraph and try not to write as if in high school - even though the story is set there. I would have added an intro to both characters, to set the story, but it wasn't really necessary as the reader could figure it out. |