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Comments from goiko
| Date | Story title | Comment |
|---|---|---|
| 2015-08-23 16:41:52 | My Inheritance, To Move Unseen 2 | Not too bad but he should explore making his Mother's life better. If he can change wood to gold then he can make their lives better. Then he can explore his sick fantasies all he wants. |
| 2015-05-01 11:33:02 | Whoops, I Came In my Mom! | Sounds like a dream instead of a story. If you do a part two slow it down and try to get an editor to help you. Always put it away and read it later to see if it sounds right. |
| 2015-04-09 19:39:59 | Cocky boy Scott pt1 | "Well for your information I'm new and it isn't about grammer it's about the story and any good writer knows if your doing something that will have chapters you always make chapter 1 the charter where you introduce characters part two of my story will have more sex" Actually it is about grammar. If the story is poorly edited, the reader will move on to something else. Also the paragraphs are too long. They should be spaced better. I'm not putting your work down, just saying you need to proofread it better. It doesn't have to be perfect just readable. |
| 2015-04-11 19:18:18 | Bible Belt - Part 1 | Inquiring minds want to know. Did you number it wrong? Is this part one instead of two? Also I think you mentioned Brad was a cousin? There should be some background on him.How and why he did what he did to his cousin. What exactly happened in New York anyway? |
| 2015-08-13 13:42:55 | Mommy's hurt (revisited)_(1) | All she had to do was ask for a fuck! |