| 2013-07-03 09:20:17 |
Lucy's Tale (Part 3)
|
Very well written and HOT ! You might consider a Proof Reader as I noticed several errors that were not corrected. Keep up the good work, you will do well. |
| 2013-07-03 10:02:26 |
a night away_(0)
|
A wonderful story line. Very HOT ! I do hope you will continue and tell us about the conference next month. Maybe he will bring along a high power vib (electric) and show her things she never, ever heard about in her sheltered life. Keep up the good work. |
| 2013-07-04 14:06:03 |
A Suburban Neighborhood
|
Great story line and form, but a little short. I hope her dad catch's the SOB and hang's him from the tree limb outside her window. Bring on the next chapter. |
| 2013-07-04 15:38:40 |
Seducing My Virgin Sister
|
Sorry, I thought I was signed in, comments below are mine, Bob |
| 2013-07-07 10:16:46 |
Lucy's Tale (Part 9)
|
This was very well written and formed. I don't like the content with the father and don't belive it helps the story at all. If you somehow removed the father completely ( maybe caught ass fucking a local youngster it would completely remove him from the story.) Otherwise your a fine writer. Good Luck ! |