| 2016-06-12 09:05:04 |
A Taste of Honey_(1)
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I read recently that Americans are driven by two obsessions, sex and money; maybe we should add control and subjugation as well, making four; also that 25% are suffering from mental illness; and a very high percentage are prescribed medication for psychoses. This is very sad, and your story here suggests that there is some truth in the sex obsession as well as the control aspect. Otherwise, the story was fine. |
| 2016-06-12 09:53:23 |
Christmas Angel_(2)
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Pars, you mentioned Edgar Allen Poe, a gifted writer of many genre. Yes, perhaps you are the modern incarnation of that man; whatever, despite the grammar/punctuation errors, your work stands above the many who try to be writers on this site. Please keep on; endeavour to become theEdgar Allen Poe of this modern age. Ignore the idiots who want sex, sex, sex and nothing but stroke by stroke sex. |
| 2016-06-25 11:48:49 |
Incest is Truly Best 2
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So, what was a good story became a drug-fired fuckathon 3 way, and at that point I bailed out. Bad move buddy, you are on my black list now. |
| 2016-06-25 12:15:05 |
Price's Party
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You seem to have a fixation with the word "started"; there are quite a number of other words you could use, words like "commenced", "began", "initiated"; another over-used word is "so". If you were to read your written works aloud, you should be able to detect over-use of particular words. |
| 2016-06-25 12:22:43 |
A Family Betrayal Chapter 41_(0)
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I must admit that I too think this has gone on far too long; in fact I was surprised to see how many episodes/chapters had been written before this. Really, it is time to close and move on. |